Ranting

Caren is honestly not a happy camper right now.
I don't generally post anything negative but I can honestly say that I feel like a beat dog right now and could seriously just bite someones face off.
If its not one thing its another these days and I feel like I have no one to talk about it even though I know I have people that would be happy to listen. I'm just so co-dependent that I don't want to bother or trouble anyone with my troubles. And the one person that I want to talk to and feel like I should be able to talk to... I can't because "he doesn't do well with emotion". whatever.
My job is coming to an end and it had me stressed out in may when I found out but I started feeling better because at the time obamacare had it set up for people who had been laid of to have 65% of their health insurance premium to be covered while on Cobra for 18 months. Well... they didn't pass that bill again and now I am left trying to figure out how in the world I am going to pay 1,191 a month. That amount is nearly double the amount of rent we pay. I have health issues that I need to take care of after the baby is born, I have a kid(s) that needs insurance (and especially once the baby gets here because the first year is full of shots and check ups!). Can't talk to my husband about that stress because its his stress too and whenever money is brought up he gets mad.
And then I had a scare with the baby a couple weeks ago and ended up in the hospital. That was an emotional roller coaster ride.
Then I get an email from a man I want absolutely nothing to do with acting like everything is fine and dandy 3 years after he screwed me and my son over.
Then my grandpa died the day before yesterday and I got barked at because i took the day off and hung out with a friend for a little bit even though the day was paid time off and I had just lost my grandpa!
Then my husband and I started fighting last night because I felt (and still feel) like he was being selfish on something so little.
I'm sick of the bickering. I'm sick of the money. I'm sick of the uncertainty. and yet I know that I just need to trust God. I just wish he would just take these stupid emotions away. I feel like crying and yet don't really want to. I just want to feel good. I just want to feel emotionally balanced and not so overwhelmed. I want to be taken care of and pampered by my husband.
I want to take a nap.
But I'll get over it. I always do.

Short and sweet

Ok. So I know that it has been a while since I have posted anything. I have been incredibly tired these days and I can't tell if it's the baby sucking the life out of me or if it is life sucking the life out of me. Ugh.

Wound up in the hospital about a week and a half ago due to some bleeding and "irritable contractions". All looks good with me and all looks good with Saiya but I tell ya... I was drained the rest of that week from the excitement around that whole ordeal. That has been about the only thing that has been not so fun other than my husband working all the time (which I'm grateful for because the income is of great help).

Got henna done with some ladies from my church last friday. We are the board for a woman's ministry progam at my church and we do fund raisers and community work projects around town. We are called "Soul Sisters" and try to involve any lady that is wanting and willing. We got the henna done though before our fundraiser last saturday. We had a summer fling and decorated lawn flamingos to put in peoples lawns. :) it was pretty fun. I have a couple pictures of the henna on my foot and on the sisters! :)

It isn't that dark for long though. If you haven't ever had henna done before... it comes out super dark brown and then starts to peel after it has dried. It lasts 1-3 weeks and that is dependent on your skin type and how well you take care of it.

That is the best I could get with my camera phone. It looks a little darker than that in real life. Its just stained onto your foot :)

Ya know... I'm running out of energy to post. I think I'm going to go and hang out with my kiddo. Sorry to cut it short. This kiddo is just sucking the life out me. Both of them are. lol Both Brodey and the baby in my belly! :)

Peace out!

Birthday Giveaway from SusannahBean

Hey everyone!

Susannahbean is having a free birthday giveaway in celebration of HER birthday!

Sorry I can't get the pic to post but this is what is in her birthday bundle so far...

What's included: *Cute owl magnet list pad*Woodgrain memo pad*Strawberry coin purse*My very own handmade Yoyo Headband*Essie nailpolish in Lilacism*Popsicle shaped bubbles*Daisy grow kit*Cupcake shaped lipgloss*Ice cream magnet*Pretty card in grey and yellow (one of my fave combos!)*Hello Kitty lip balms

Here is link to her birthday blog with details on how you can be part of the fun!

http://susannahbean.blogspot.com/2010/06/birthday-giveaway.html

I hope you all had a fun and blessed weekend!

Take care :)

"C"aren